“For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.” Luke 9:24
How many of you really enjoy change? There are some who do. They relish change. They look forward to the next change they’ll experience in life. I’ve noticed something about people like that, though. They enjoy change as long as the change is something “good,” or at least neutral. But if the change is to something they think is bad, they don’t like that change so much. And who would? None of us hopes that things will get worse! Many of us don’t like change. Even if we don’t mind it, we want to be somewhat in control of the change. We want to make sure that the change isn’t going to make things worse for us. And if it does, we want to know what’s coming so we can prepare. Since none of us knows the future, some people prepare by expecting the worst.
Over the last few months, we have all experienced a great deal of change. Most of it has been changes that we couldn’t have foreseen. Therefore, many weren’t emotionally prepared. There’s been a lot of talk about when things get “back to normal.” Many people, myself included, have been looking forward to that day. But will things really ever get back to the way they were? Do we even want them to? For that matter, do we really know what we want? There have been so many times when I thought I knew what I wanted but God gave me something different. That was hard until I realized that the new normal was better than the old normal. Even though I remember those times well, I still want to hang onto the normal I had a few months ago, the one I had become comfortable with.
What does all of this have to do with this verse from Luke? I’ve come to realize that my desire for things to go back to the way they were is idolatry. I’m telling God that I know what’s best and whatever He has planned isn’t as good as what I want. Honestly, it doesn’t always seem as good from a human perspective. Maybe we’ve lost something dear to us, or at least something we relied on. A relationship, a loved one, an income, our health, a dream. The loss of any of those things is hard. But God can use even those things to draw us closer to Him. In fact, sometimes we need to get those things out of the way in our hearts to make room for God. In other words, we need to let go of what we thought was life in order to experience His fullness of life. It’s not easy. But then, Jesus didn’t say it would be. But He did say it would be worth it! So I’m starting to pry my fingers free of the grip they have on what I think I want. I want to open my hands to receive what God has planned for me. I don’t know what it’s going to be. I don’t know when it will happen. I don’t know if it’s going to be “good” or “bad” from a human perspective. But I do know that God wants only the best for me. So it’s time to let go!